Snowbird turns on his winter wonderland

The Best of Stubble Mulch

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Every winter thousands of flatlanders migrate to the warm and sunny southwest.

Some find that the desert isn’t all it’s bragged up to be. They soon sell their adobe with its fashionable “Arizona Room” and return to our Winter Wonderland. 

One snowbird who did, kept a diary.

Dec. 8 – It started to snow this evening, the first of the season. The wife and I took our coffee and sat by the window, watching the soft, fluffy flakes floating down all around. You won’t see that in Phoenix. What a beautiful sight. Our little poodle Buster sat in the wife’s lap and barked joyously at the falling snowflakes. What an enjoyable day.

Dec. 9 – We awoke to a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering the landscape. What a fantastic sight. Every tree and shrub covered with a white mantel. I shoveled snow for the first time in many years, and loved it. I did the driveway and even made a little path to the alley, and then scraped away a place on the lawn for Buster to use when we let him out each night.

Later, the snowplow came by and covered our sidewalk with compacted snow. I was glad to have more to do, and shoveled it away while Buster, wearing a little red ribbon the wife made for him, frolicked nearby.

Dec. 12 – The sun has melted our lovely snow. Oh, well. I’m sure we’ll get more before winter is over.

Dec. 14 – It snowed 8 inches last night, and the temperature dropped to minus 20. Shoveled the driveway again, but decided the path to the alley wasn’t really necessary. And since Buster likes to play in the snow so much, he can get by without a cleared spot on the lawn. The city snowplow came by again and now the driveway exit is covered, and Buster was nearly crushed by a big boulder of snow.

Dec. 15 – Went to the car dealer today and traded our van for a 4x4. Bought snow tires for the wife’s car.

Dec. 17 – Still very cold. Took cars in to get antifreeze checked.

Dec. 20 – We had another 20 inches of that darned white stuff again. And that dad-burned snowplow came by again – twice. Called the station to send someone over with jumper cables to get our cars started. Found Buster, whom we had let outside last night to visit his “spot.” He was frozen solid to the metal on one of my snow shovels, one tiny leg up in the air. We chopped him loose and brought the poor whimpering thing into the house. What a sight for sore eyes he was.

Dec. 22 – We will have a white Christmas because 13 more inches of junk fell last night. Got all bundled up in coveralls and overshoes to go out and shovel.

Dec. 23 – If I ever catch that jerk that drives the snowplow I’ll bury him in a snow bank. I think he hides down the street and waits for me to finish shoveling my sidewalk and driveway. Then he comes barreling down the street and I think he is actually laughing. I threw my shovel at him today and he gave me a smarty-pants one-fingered salute as he passed.

Dec. 25 – Merry Christmas? Bah! Humbug! The forecast is for 20 more inches of white junk tonight, for cripes sake. That fat TV weatherman talks about it like he’s happy it’s coming. Does he know how many shovels full that 20 inches of snow is? If he shoveled his own sidewalk he wouldn’t be so fat. That wiseacre snowplow guy came by asking for a donation to the city’s kid hockey club. I returned his salute and slammed the door in his face. 

Dec. 26 – We got more snow. Car was towed away because I left it parked on the street while I came in to get my gloves. Called the mayor to complain and he just laughed. I think he’s related to the snowplow guy.

Dec. 27 – Called the real estate office to list our house, but our driveway and sidewalk are blocked with snow, and the snowplow guy hasn’t come by, so they can’t show the house to a prospective buyer. Picked up some brochures from the travel agency.

Jan. 1 – The New Year brought new snow. I just cleared enough of the driveway so I could back the car out. I left and headed for Phoenix and my Arizona Room at 85 miles an hour. About 5 miles down the road I remembered I’d forgotten something, so I turned around and went back to get Buster and the wife. 

If you’d like to comment, email the author at cfcecil@swiftel.net.