This week’s Reflections was written by Gregg TeBeest, chaplain at Brookings Health System.

When I was young, I enjoyed visits to my grandparents’ house in Castlewood.

It was an old house with nooks and crannies to explore. The attic was a favorite hangout for me and my siblings. It was hot and a little creepy, but there were hidden treasures in the attic. Once in a while we would find a strange-looking antique for my grandparents to identify. The attic was full of mystery and intrigue.

As interesting as the attic was, there was another room in the house that intrigued me even more. It wasn’t creepy, just strange in my thinking.

We kids called it “the parlor.” The parlor didn’t seem to serve much purpose in my thinking. We ate meals in there once in awhile but most of the time the parlor sat dark and empty. I remember wondering what the two huge pocket doors were about. It wasn’t until I was much older that I discovered the real purpose for the pocket doors.

In my grandparents’ day most people died in their homes (80% in the late 1800s and early 1900s). Consequently, dying was a family affair as loved ones were cared for by family members. The family washed the body and in many cases built the coffin and prepared the burial site. Even young children were involved and learned about death firsthand. Because funeral homes were nearly non-existent, many homes had parlors which served as the place of visitation. Hence, the pocket doors which served as a passageway for the casket.

By the 1970s death and dying were nearly entirely handed over by families to the professionals. As medical technology advanced, the hospital room became the place where nearly all Americans died.

After death, the funeral home became the place where the body was prepared and kept for burial. Because of these and other shifts in our culture, death was no longer accepted as a natural part of life but something to be avoided, even denied. Today our society is now completely immersed in the worship and preservation of youth. The U.S. anti-aging market was estimated to be worth $19.18 billion in 2023.

The truth of the matter is that we are mortal beings. None of us are getting out of this alive. And no amount of death denial can prevent it. But should this be of concern to us? Is death not a part of the grand design?

“There is a time for every event under heaven,” says the writer of Ecclesiastes. “There is a time to weep and a time to laugh; a time to mourn and a time to dance; a time to give birth, and a time to die” (Ecclesiastes 3:1-4). Yes, there is a time to die.

Norman Cousins said, “Death is not the enemy; living in constant fear of it is.” Angus Tuck, a leading character in the children’s novel Tuck Everlasting said, “Don’t be afraid of death, but rather the unlived life.” Life (and inevitably death) is not to be feared but rather enjoyed as a gift from God.

Because life is very short, we must redeem the time. We must take advantage of every opportunity to reflect on the good things in life and enjoy them to the fullest. Reflect, for example, on the simple things in life: the fragrance of a rose; the beauty of a prairie sunset; the perfectly formed fingers of a newborn baby. Reflect on your life — the good things you have done and meaningful relationships you enjoy. And finally, reflect on your death.

God was present when you came into this world and God will be there when you go out.